Back continues to kill me, and it's having an effect on my mood. I'm very edgy and annoyed. I don't like it. Surgery might not be Thursday since they haven't finished getting all the equipment. Makes me feel very secure knowing the place I'm going to have it done at has never done this type of surgery. Went to GCC today to buy my $140 Business Law book for tomorrow's class. By the time I parked, walked to the bookstore, and walked back to my car, there were tears in my eyes. I don't know how I'm going to do it tomorrow. It hurts, it fuckin hurts. It hurts 10 times more than it did last week. I wish I was exagerating. Decided to stay till 7:30 at work since I get depressed at home. If my surgery isn't on thursday, I'm going down to Irvine to chill with Araks. Haven't seen her forever. I miss her. I wish my back would hurt more. 100 times more. Keep on hurting bitch, let's see who wins. I'm gonna put a fucking knife to it myself. Throw more at me. Why stop with the back? Test me, push me! I'm a masochist! Fuck!