The Odds of Dying

Shamelessly copied from LifeScience:

All figures below are for U.S. residents:

Cause of Death	Lifetime Odds
Heart Disease	1-in-5
Cancer	1-in-7
Stroke	1-in-23
Accidental Injury	1-in-36
Motor Vehicle Accident*	1-in-100
Intentional Self-harm (suicide)	1-in-121
Falling Down	1-in-246
Assault by Firearm	1-in-325
Fire or Smoke	1-in-1,116
Natural Forces (heat, cold, storms, quakes, etc.)	1-in-3,357
Electrocution*	1-in-5,000
Drowning	1-in-8,942
Air Travel Accident*	1-in-20,000
Flood* (included also in Natural Forces above)	1-in-30,000
Legal Execution	1-in-58,618
Tornado* (included also in Natural Forces above)	1-in-60,000
Lightning Strike (included also in Natural Forces above)	1-in-83,930
Snake, Bee or other Venomous Bite or Sting*	1-in-100,000
Earthquake (included also in Natural Forces above)	1-in-131,890
Dog Attack	1-in-147,717
Asteroid Impact*	1-in-200,000**
Tsunami*	1-in-500,000
Fireworks Discharge	1-in-615,488

** Perhaps 1-in-500,000

Ouch.

Causing a 4-car accident is never a good thing. It being caused by your brakes going out is worse.

Commonly Confused Words

I get really annoyed when people make grammar mistakes. I felt it was only right for me to take this quiz. I got 100% on the beginner, and intermediate, 96% on advanced, and 66% on expert. Give it a shot, let me know what you get:

Commonly Confused Words Test

The Beauty of Wars

Murders In The United States From 1997 to 2003 (7 years): 115,059
Murders In Iraq Committed By Us In 2 Years: Over 150,000

Superman Is a Bitch!

My favorite childhood hero is actually a bitch! Check out this site for REAL comic covers showing just that! Check out each of the 3 sections: Examples of Superdickery, Confounding Comic Covers, and Frames and Panels:

Superdickery.com

New T-Mobile Phone

I just bought the Motoral V600. Someone please take the iPAQ off my hands.

HP iPaq 6315 WiFi, Bluetooth, Quad-Band GSM Camera

Anybody want the HP iPaq 6315 Phone? I have a brand new one (sent as a replacement because mine is damaged). It's locked to T-Mobile service (SIM card not included), but there are ways of unlocking it. It's got:

Microsoft Windows Pocket PC
64 MB ram (expandable)
Earpiece
Keyboard
Docking Station
Charger
Software
Anything else included in the retail package

It can play MP3s, store your contacts, and sync with your PC.

A USED model is going for $365 on eBay. I'm willing to sell this for $350 to get it off my hands. I realize I don't need something of this caliber. I miss my regular no-features phone. You can buy it and sell it yourself, I don't really care what you do with it. Let me know soon before I put it on eBay myself or something.

Blogger Issues

I apologize for the lack of posts recently. Blogger has been having issues lately and I have not been able to post anything. But, alas, everything seems to be working fine (comment system should also be up and running). Time for a surge of posts!

Moment of Zen:

Bush: At It Again!

Political Wire: "In an interview with Time magazine, President Bush declared the war in Iraq a 'catastrophic success.' Sen. John Edwards responds in the Washington Post: 'I, like most Americans, have no idea what that means.'"

A few weeks earlier: "Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we."

I feel catastrophically safer. Thank you President Bush!!

Peek-a-boo!



Catastrophically happy!

P2P Back Again

Kazaa has slowly degraded in both quantity and quality. Most songs are corrupt and finding anything decent has become almost impossible. I looked around and found LimeWire. Now, I had used LimeWire when it just came out and wasn't too happy about it. However, they have come a long way. No spyware and no adware means you won't have to worry about random popups (ALWAYS a good thing). I was able to find all the songs I wanted without a single corrupt song. You guys should give it a shot and let me know how it works out for you:

Direct LimeWire link

It might ask you if you would like to purchase the Pro version. Just ignore that.


Disclaimer: Of course, by downloading music I mean non copy written work that does not violate any copyright laws. I do not endorse the downloading or sharing of illegal music. Please don’t sue me, I got a big family, SUE THEM!

The Magic of Real Estate

Everyone has heard that there are millions to be made in real estate. There are thousands of tapes, CDs, DVDs, books, magazines, and seminars on how to make money from real estate. To be honest, I never cared for any of them. Now that I have been exposed to real estate, I am utterly shocked at the exponential profits some people are making.

For example, Marriott builds timeshares that cost roughly $120,000 to build and sells them in one week slots for $40,000. Since you are only allowed to sell 51 1/2 weeks out of the year (half a week must be dedicated to cleaning and maintenance), Marriott makes a modest $2 million with a $120,000 investment. Being Marriott, of course, they don't build one unit. They build 300. So let's calculate:

Cost:
300 X $120,000 = $36,000,000
Other Expenses = $ 4,000,000

Total Cost: $40,000,000

Gross Sales:
300 X $40,000 X 51.5 = $618,000,000

Total Gross: $618,000,000

Net Profit: $578,000,000

Yes, that's correct. $578 million in profit from ONE project. Marriott has HUNDREDS of projects going on. Imagine that.

The current project I'm working on is a 150 unit apartment complex. The developer bought it for $20 million and is going to convert them into condominiums. At a modest selling price of $250,000 per unit, he will make $17.5 million within a year. Not bad, not bad at all.


Besides the market for multi-million dollar developers, there is money to be made in every other sector of real estate. Most notably: real estate law. A real estate attorney who specializes in subdivisions can make $4,000 from half an hour's worth of work of preparing CC&Rs (Covenants, Conditions, and Restrictions).

Before I got involved in this industry, I, like most people, didn't know much about how real estate worked, how people were getting rich from it, or how to get in on the action.

I'm glad I know now. It is going to pay off handsomely.

Bonus points for anyone who can guess what building that is.

Review: T-Mobile iPAQ H6315

As requested by Fred, I shall write a review on my cell phone.

$500, what a waste! I am very disappointed by my hip PDA/Phone. It can't do much of either. One of the biggest problems is that it can't be used very well with one hand. This is a big problem when driving and trying to find a number to dial. The screen is super sensitive at times, and not responsive AT ALL when I need it. This is the first phone I've had that actually FREEZES. I have to restart it in order to get it working again.

The PDA functions are very well done and the handwriting recognition is impressive. However, they really shouldn't have made it into a phone. The firmware sucks. The battery life is horrible. The reception is horrible as well. If I hadn't had a T-Mobile before, I would have thought T-Mobile sucks in general. Nope, it's the phone. Randomly it drops calls, sometimes it never even rings, and other times the reception indication bar freezes and I can't tell whether or not I have service. Another annoyance is the vibrate. Instead of the usual pulsating vibrate, this damn thing has a long vibrate that annoys the hell out of it. The damn thing vibrates for 5 seconds at a time. That's a DAMN long time!

It is extremely bulky to place up to your ear (not to mention the hassle of accidentally clicking on things with your chin) so I bought a Bluetooth earpiece. Works somewhat ok, and I'm willing to bet that it's the phone's fault. On receiving calls, people say I sound like I'm talking from across the room, but when I call, it sounds fine. That's really annoying.

In summary, I can't wait to return it. I hope I can return this haunted thing. I haven't checked what the policy is on returning horribly designed phones.

Can anyone recommend a good T-Mobile phone? Clamshell preferably. I miss my i730.


<-- Satan's Right Hand Man.

George Bush At His Best

Our wonderful and all-powerful President at his very best:

Here he is with other world leaders trying to figure who's fault it was that we f***** up in Iraq:



Who says we have bad relations with Russia? Just look at these two lovebirds:



This, if some of you don't know, is a warning signal monkeys use to ward off invaders:



And here he is demonstrating how we are dedicated to peace.... by making hand gestures of doves!



But Mr. Bush isn't the only one who can put a smile on the nation's face. Look at his wife cheering up our troops in Iraq:




And lastly, our new Secretary of State putting on a smile:

Guest Blogging Has Failed

I'll give it another week. So far, not good.

Pet Peeve #1

OK I must stop working now to make this most. One of my biggest pet peeves is people quoting themselves. Now, to be politically correct and to not offend anyone, I will keep the names of such people anonymous...... HA! Who am I kidding? I don't censor! I have nothing against the following people and they aren't the only ones doing it, but they happened to be online at the moment with the following:

From Hasmig's profile:
"Cockiness is taking advantage of your confidence." - Hasmig

From Michelle's profile:
"Never wear your heart on your sleeve.. keep it where its protected.. inside." -me


Let's see how the American Heritage Dictionary defines "quote":

quote
v., quot·ed, quot·ing, quotes. v.tr.

1. To repeat or copy the words of another, usually with acknowledgment of the source.

In other words, you can't quote yourself! Sound off!

Virulent Strain of STD called Gonorrhea Lectim

The Center for Disease Control has issued a warning about a new virulent strain of sexually transmitted disease. This disease is contracted through dangerous and high risk behavior. The disease is called Gonorrhea Lectim (pronounced "gonna re-elect him"). Many victims have contracted it after having been screwed for the past 4 years, in spite of having taken measures to protect themselves from this especially troublesome disease. Cognative sequels of individuals infected with Gonorrhea Lectim include, but are not limited to:

Anti-social personality disorder traits; delusions of grandeur with a distinct messianic flavor; chronic mangling of the English language; extreme cognitive dissonance; inability to incorporate new information (pronounced xenophobia); inability to accept responsibility of actions; exceptional cowardice masked by acts of misplaced bravado; uncontrolled facial smirking; ignorance of geography and history; tendencies toward creating evangelical theocracies; and a strong propensity for categorical, all or nothing behavior.

The disease is sweeping Washington. Naturalists and epidemiologists are amazed and baffled with this malignant disease originated only a few years ago in a Texas Bush.

The Ring

From USA Today:

When Marine Lance Cpl. David Battle learned he'd either have to sacrifice his ring finger or the wedding band he wore, he told doctors at a field hospital in Iraq to cut off the finger.

The 19-year-old former high school football star suffered a mangled left hand and serious wounds to his legs in a Nov. 13 fire fight in Fallujah. Battle, who is recovering at his parents' home in this desert city 80 miles northeast of Los Angeles, came under attack as he and fellow Marines entered a building. Eleven other Marines were wounded.

Doctors were preparing to cut off Battle's ring to save as much of his finger as they could.

"But that would mean destroying my wedding ring," he said. "My wife is the strongest woman I know. She's basically running two people's lives since I've been gone. I don't think I could ever repay her or show her how grateful ... how much I love my wife, my soul mate."

With his approval, doctors severed his finger, but somehow in the chaos that followed, they lost his ring.